April is World Autism Month, and while many people still don’t understand exactly what Autism is and there’s TONS of work to be done to end the stigma, I’m proud to blessed to raise a child who is differently-abled and on the spectrum.
Full transparency: when Asa was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at the age of five, I was somewhat afraid, because it’s hard raising a young Black boy in America to say the least. There are already so many strikes against him in this world.
But experiencing the world through his eyes has helped me to appreciate our son’s unique qualities. This experience has blessed us so much! Here’s why I love being a spectrum mom!
He has a great sense of intuition
I’m not sure where the notion that autistic individuals are insensitive and don’t understand emotion. It’s quite the opposite, especially for Asa. At times when it seems like I’m getting lost in the shuffle, frustrated, or sad, he knows just the thing to do or say to let me know he cares – even too much at times, like an overprotective parent. Lol Even weeks after my mother passed away, Asa will still remind me, “Don’t be sad, mom.”, and give me the tightest hug. Or sometimes when I’m resting he’ll check on me to make sure I’m okay.
For individuals on the spectrum, it may be challenging to articulate or express his/her emotions, but they’re often able to read others’ emotions, feel empathy, and show compassion.
He points out the best qualities in others
Because Asa is so intuitive, he sees the best in people – even people who aren’t too kind to him. This is a blessing, because he’s shown me that all people are special in some way, and it’s refreshing to see someone recognize a jewel in every person he meets. If there’s a classmate who others may think is bothersome, Asa will come to his/her defense, pointing out positive traits. Seeing him do this daily reminds me that we are all indeed special in God’s eyes (Psalm 139:14).
Seeing him do this daily reminds me that we are all indeed special in God’s eyes (Psalm 139:14).
He’s unaffected by what’s happening around him
Individuals on the spectrum can be so focused on what’s in front of them, that they block out all other distractions. Asa concentrates most on his homework, playing with a toy or video game, or watching a football game. There could be a ton of noise happening in our house, but he’s just as peaceful as can be and happy doing what he loves! (When the doorbell is ringing like crazy, or when his little sister is having a meltdown, it would be great to have him help me out, but hey – can’t win them all.) Because I experience anxiety, I tend to get irritated or distracted easily, and it’s during those intense moments that I wish I could be just as unaffected as he is.
He strives for excellence
…and this can cause him to take forever to complete what seems like the simplest task or project, which admittedly works my nerves! But you know what? He takes pride in his work, and gives 100%. The kid’s no slacker. We’re working on finding that perfect balance (e.g., visual schedules, using a timer, etc.), but there are so many adults who could learn from his work ethic.
He enjoys the simple things
I’ve never seen a child so content. One year, he had just one thing on his Christmas list, even after I asked repeatedly if there was anything else he wanted. He’s easy to please, doesn’t ask for a lot, and isn’t into having a bunch of things. Experiences and time with family mean the most to him, like movie nights, trips downtown on the train, or just going outside to play football. In a world where we cling to material things, this is so refreshing.
Having a child on the spectrum can be a challenge. Much like Asa, I’m learning how to navigate his normal on a daily basis – not the other way around. Being his mother has ministered to me in ways I can’t imagine. He’s my daily example of how to treat others, how to enjoy the moment, and how to cherish what I have…and I’m simply in awe of that, and forever grateful.
Do you have a loved one on the spectrum? What lessons have you learned from them? Share them below. Happy World Autism Month!
I love your transparency and willingness to share. Some may not understand your WHY but know that someone will when hear the story you tell. I takes a bit of courage to share your story and have an impact on those who see / hear/read it. Keep sharing because you are giving insight for those who who dont know or even understand.